September 6, 2020

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January 23, 2020

The Journey of Preparation to Singleness, Marriage & Intimacy With God





Have you ever read or heard the poem sugar and spice? If not here it is:


Sugar and spice

and everything nice

that's what little girls are made of


Sunshine and rainbows

and ribbons for hair bows

that's what little girls are made of


Tea parties, laces

and baby doll faces

that's what little girls are made of


Wait a minute...I like all that stuff, but that's not what I'm made of. In fact I also like to play baseball, football, and climb up trees, but again this is not what I'm made of.


If that’s what they say about girls, what are they saying that boys are made of?


What are little boys made of?

What are little boys made of?

Snips and snails

And puppy-dogs’ tails,

That’s what little boys are made of.


I don't think so…last time I checked not my daddy, my uncles, brothers, or son had a snips or a snail and they surly didn't have no puppy-dogs tail.


Today’s Lesson: Never let anyone define who you are.


In this journey of preparation into singleness, marriage and intimacy with God you will be tempted to conform to labels and roles that try to define who you are. However, God is the author and finisher of our fate not man. Not a popular belief of society. 


There was a time recently that I believed the stigma related to being a single mom. That because I was a mother of six children no man would ever want to marry me.


I believed the absence of a husband defined me as a person in a negative way as a woman. You see it in movies, memes and comedy routines. Where the single black mom with all her kids must have different baby daddies and be on warfare. 


So to counteract this definition, I would always give a reason for Brady Bunch count of kids. I would say; 


“I only gave birth to two by the same man who is my ex-husband, two of them are my step daughters from that ex-husband and the other two girls are my nieces WE adopted"


I spoke this out like I was reading a script. Hoping that my explanation would take me out of the single mama drama club and make them think better of me.


It wasn’t until God gave me this lesson that I was liberated to created my own definitions of my life story.


Now when I'm asked if I have children I proudly say, Yes I'm a mother of 6 beautiful highly intelligent children....would you like to see a picture of I pull out my phone.  


Until tomorrow nobody can define you but you so create your own definitions and live!


With Beautiful Love



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